Diary of a True Blood virgin – Bill Dauterive: gay vampire

For those of you unaware, Steven Root is a very successful character actor. He’s been in such shows as NewsRadio, The West Wing and Pushing Daisies. He was also Gordon in Dodgeball and — wait for it — Milton in Office Space. I love him best in his 13 season run as Bill Dauterive on King of the Hill. He’s just one of those actors you enjoy seeing pop up in movies and shows. So, I was very pleased to see him in True Blood … even if his character wasn’t very happy to be there.

1.8 “The Fourth Man in the Fire”

“I always look forward to Monday nights. First ‘Heroes’, then you.”

I was pretty sad that they killed Kevin McHale‘s character off-screen. I know his character was sacrificed to explain the fourth coffin shown in last episode’s cliffhanger, but I felt bad for McHale for getting such a quick send-off. On the other hand, the guy went on to star in Glee, so I guess we shouldn’t feel too bad for him.

Last virgin diary post, I mentioned Sookie’s first time seeming rather pedestrian for what the show is. So, this episode we got crazy graveyard sex! It’s probably a good thing Sookie was there to see her butt-naked boyfriend crawling out of his own grave, because if anyone else had been there instead it would have been awkward. The great thing is how quickly Sookie goes from “Oh my God, zombie!” to “Oh my God, my boyfriend isn’t a pile of blood goo!” to “Oh my God, this is totally a great time to have sex!”

I’m pretty dumbfounded at how quickly Amy went into shaking-heroin-addict-coming-down mode. I should have known something was up with her when she started telling Jason he was both special and not an idiot. But hey, it got us to Eddie, Steven Root’s character. What a sad little man. Still I am far too happy that Eddie’s voice is almost identical to Bill Dauterive’s on King of the Hill.

1.9 “Plaisir D’Amour”

“Tru Blood, it keeps you alive, but it will bore you to death.”

Some of you might know this, but I’m the Clacker that reviews the US version of Being Human, which features vampires as well as ghost and werewolves. When vampires are staked in Being Human, they turn to dust within maybe 10 seconds. When the vampire bartender got staked in this episode, I expected something similar. What I got instead was the girl from The Exorcist on blood crack followed by the Nazis from Raiders of the Lost Ark. Part of me wishes someone would have warned me before hand, while the other part is glad I got to enjoy the craziest unexpected explosion of gore I’ve ever seen. And this is coming from someone who hates gory scenes. My one question is, with all the vampire blood that went into Sookie’s mouth, how did she not OD on it?

I don’t get why the ladies swoon for Eric; he just seems like a big douche to me. Honestly, I haven’t seen him do anything redeeming in the handful of episodes he’s been in. What amazing thing does he do later in the series that brings him so many fans? Don’t tell me it’s just because he’s hot … because I don’t see it. His haircut is absolutely ridiculous, and don’t get me started on his monotone voice!

Amy sure is a piece of work, isn’t she? I especially couldn’t believe when she paused before having sex with Jason to thank Eddie for his “gift.” Yeah, I’m sure he appreciated your graciousness while you had him held against his will in your basement.

This is easily the most I’ve liked Jason because of his kindness to Eddie, but even then he’s pretty tactless and stupid. During their conversation, Jason asks why Eddie is pudgy when most vampires are all cut and handsome. Not long later, Jason questions why the gay Eddie doesn’t look like the stereotypical gay man … all cut and handsome. The whole vampirism-as-homosexuality trope in the show is made more complicated when you’re dealing with vampires who are also gay … can you really have a metaphor when the hidden meaning is also outwardly represented?

I really like Tara and Sam together… despite her rough personality, Tara is the most likable character on the show because she’s actually relatable. And it’s nice to see Sam not be a doormat for Sookie as much … although apparently he is her lap dog. I knew he was a werewolf!

1.10 “I Don’t Wanna Know”

“We’re not werewolves!”

… Fine, so Sam’s not a werewolf. But come on! He changes into an animal every full moon, and he’s competing in vain with a vampire for the love of a girl he’s known for years — in modern pseudo-femporn terms, he’s a werewolf. He’s one Native American relative away from being an older Jacob Black.

I really wanted Tara’s exorcism to work. Even though the exorcist was a fraud, I’m going to guess Tara really did/still does have something supernaturally wrong with her. The one relationship I’m actually rooting for in this show is Tara and Sam, so here’s hoping that she figures out what’s wrong with her. I also like Terry the war vet, just for being so sweet and sad.

I wasn’t sure how long Eddie would be on the show, but I had a feeling he wouldn’t last too long. Amy has officially gone from hippie to strung-out bigot. For her to use her hippie lifestyle as a badge of honor while holding a creature hostage … yeah, I think Eddie calling her a psychopath was justified. I was sad to see him vomit blood and go all Ark of the Covenant.

I’m starting to see why fans don’t like Bill. He’s creepy in the way Edward Cullen is creepy — you know, the controlling overprotective kind of creepy. The kind of creepy we shouldn’t be condoning in this day and age. More than that, there doesn’t seem to be any growth in his and Sookie’s relationship (I could have made an erection joke here, but I chose to take the high road. I hope you’re happy). The first couple episodes they actually get to know each other, but now there’s practically nothing. Every conversation is how she needs to be protected, and I’ve got a feeling that’s going to get old and fast.

Clacked by Katie Schenkel
on Jun 23, 2011 @ 11:00 EST5EDT