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Desperate Housewives – The past haunts the present

The past comes back to haunt several housewives, while Lynette's family is worried they're in for a real haunting.

- Season 7, Episode 14 - "Flashback"

Flashback

Desperate Housewives returned this week, hitting its stride once again. But what is with ABC scheduling the show against the Grammys? First they put a new episode up against the Golden Globes and now this? If I were a conspiracy theorist, I’d say ABC is intentionally putting the show up against these television events in order to drive the ratings down a bit so that they can tell the stars, who are apparently approaching contract renegotiation status, that the ratings don’t justify giving them hefty raises. ABC wouldn’t really do that, would they?

This week’s show was all about how the past affects lives in the present. We got to see Zach Young, drug-addicted, paranoid and very angry after learning that his father had been released from prison. As I speculated in the last post, Zach did indeed shoot Paul and ditched the gun – which was the same one Mary Alice used to kill herself — at Bree’s when he showed up disguised as the flower delivery guy. Paul wanted to know his whereabouts, but Mike — who I totally forgot was Zach’s real dad — refused to tell him until he saw the state Zach was in. Quite a surprise when your two dads show up on your doorstep.

Susan’s past came back to haunt her when an old high school classmate happened across her at the hospital and found out she needed a kidney. Low and behold the classmate, Monroe (guest Dave Foley), was a perfect match … only problem is he was a stalker and hoped that giving Susan a kidney would bring them closer together, unaware that she is married. Unfortunately for her, breaking Monroe’s heart also left her without that needed kidney. Gaby also had to finally face her demons when Carlos insisted she see a therapist — which she ditched for spa therapy — but he finally convinced her to confront her abusive past to deal with her Grace issues. And Bree revealed to Keith that he has a son — fallout from that is yet to come.

For me, the best part of the show involved Lynette’s mother Stella and her new husband Frank. Larry Hagman was a hoot as the politically incorrect old codger who insisted on having a portrait taken with his new family because none of his other families are speaking to him. Stella is only interested in his millions, so she’s insisting the Scavo family play along but Frank’s unexpected passing in the middle of the picture-taking left them all with a dilemma – report the death or wait until the next morning when his new will went into effect. Stella worked Lynette with promises of leaving her alone and actually providing for the family instead of vice versa and Lynette gave in. There were some funny moments as Lynette teased a spooked Tom, who couldn’t stop staring at the sheet-covered body, but I’m waiting for some other shoe to drop. Certainly the coroner will be able to determine Frank died before midnight, no? And did Stella really inherit Frank’s millions hours later? It may just be a plot convenience, but it just rings too false in a show known for its absurdities.

“I’m making grilled salmon. Why did you get a pizza?” – Bree
“Because you’re making grilled salmon.” – Keith

“I love therapy!” – Gaby
“Really?” – Carlos
“Yeah! It’s like a talk show where I’m the guest and the only topic is me.” – Gaby

“I’m getting a man kidney?” – Susan, upon learning the identity of her donor

“How was the drive over?” – Lynette
“It took forever! We got behind this Asian woman driver, slow as soy sauce going uphill in winter.” – Frank

“I didn’t want Frank in my house when he was alive, now you want me to hang out with his corpse?” – Lynette
“Throw a sheet over him, spray a little air freshener, you won’t even notice.” – Stella, more concerned about her inheritance than her dead husband

“There’s close and then there’s Glenn Close.” – Susan to her donor/stalker

Photo Credit: ABC

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