“These old doomsday devices are dangerously unstable. I’ll rest easier not knowing where they are.” – Professor
“So long, overly complicated Japanese toilet!” – Leela
“Please. Not throw away. I givea you … happy poopy time.” – Toilet
“Sorry, you know too much.” – Fry
“Scoop Chang, New New York Times online podcast blog comments editor. Mr. Mayor, isn’t this e-waste dangerous?” – Scoop
“Not at all, Scoop. Not after it’s hauled off to the third world by an expendable team of minimum wage nobodies.” – Mayor
“Good news, nobodies!” – Professor
“*sniff sniff* What smells like bloody sinuses?” – Fry
“That’s even more horrific! Is all the work done by children?” – Leela
“No, not the whipping!” – Worker
“With the new eyePhone, you can watch, listen, ignore your friends, stalk your ex, download porno on a crowded bus, even check your email while getting hit by a train. All with the new eyePhone. From Mom.” – Commercial
“Is there an app for kissing my shiny metal ass?” – Bender
“Several!” – Nerd in line
“Ooooo!” – Bender
“The new eyePhone is wonderful. I use it to check recipes and send threatening emails to unauthorized third-party app developers.” – Mom
“*Ringing* Wh-what’s happening to me?! Is it puberty?!” – Fry
“It’s a phone call, dingus.” – Bender
“These eyePhones are phones too?!” – Fry
“Duh!” – Bender
“You named your boil ‘Susan?'” – Fry
“Play it one more time!” – Hermes
“No! It’s humiliating and degrading to Leela. Play it ten more times!” – Professor
“*sniff sniff* What stinks? Were you rolling around in New Jersey?” – Leela
Clacked by Keith McDuffee 
on Jul 01, 2010 @ 22:46 EST5EDT
Store clerk: “Ok, it’s 500$, you have no choice of carrier, the battery can’t hold the charge and the reception isn’t very…”
Fry: “Shut up and take my money!”