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Hell’s Kitchen – Is there a doctor in the house for Gordon Ramsay?

Celebrity chef Gordon Ramsay is kicking off the seventh season of 'Hell's Kitchen.' And if you haven't heard, this show is not for the faint of heart.

- Season 7, Episode 1 - "HK7: Day One"

Some people say it’s good to let your anger out. Cleansing. Lowers the blood pressure. Leads to a reduction in stress. But I think it could also be argued that if you have a lot of rage, and choose to spew it out indiscriminately, that might not be so healthy either.

That’s why I’m concerned for my Gordon Ramsay. He’s quite dear to me (see my related posts for Kitchen Nightmares) , and though he lost his temper frequently on KN, I’d forgotten how he lets the contestants on Hell’s Kitchen yank his hottie chain. I mean, truly! It’s only the first episode, and I do believe he almost had an aneurysm of some sort.

You’ve seen the show, most likely. And maybe Gordon’s personality has made you abandon ship. I don’t blame you if that’s the case. Anyone whose had any past trau or dra-ma usually finds my Ramsay a bit to much to handle. That’s fine. You can catch Glee at nine. But for those of you still with me, fasten your seatbelts and tighten your lobster bibs! It’s going to be a bumpy and bleep-filled ride.

In this premiere, Gordon meets the 16 contenders in the running to endure his insults and tantrums to become the ultimate winner of Hell’s Kitchen. This  year’s winner gets a chef position at the Savoy in London.

Their first task, is to make their personal “signature dish” to present to him, in teams of men (Blue Team) versus women (Red Team). The first woman Gordon pulls out of the line, admits to no kitchen experience, and is rather mousy. Despite calling her dish as appealing as “baby vomit,” Gordon admits it tastes delicious! He asks her why she looks so nervous. She says she finds him “scary.” He hugs her and tells her not to be afraid. And then! My Gordon lays a big fat juicy one on her. Yep. No lie. Turns out to be a gag, and it’s really his wife in a bad wig. I saw no point in this bit of fluff, except to make me jealous. It worked, the torturer!

The women lose the challenge, and have to serve the Blue Team breakfast in bed the next morning. Overnight, they all get menus to study in the dorms. Which are nicer than my house. Their study is interrupted by the fire alarm at regular intervals, alerting them to a TV screen to watch demonstrations of Gordon preparing the most important dishes. You see, Gordon has promised the press that for the first time in HK history, the first night of dinner service will be completely, um … completed. That scamp! Sleep deprivation always causes mistakes, and this way my Gordon can see how the contestants react under pressure.

The answer to that being not well. Not well at all. Fran puts crab in the lobster appetizer. Stacey, who bragged at the beginning that she was a personal chef to many notable movie stars, gets immediately flustered when Gordon “f’s” at her. Benjamin double dips. Marie laughs when corrected. And Mullet Guy Mikey keeps undercooking the halibut.

Woah. For awhile there, it seems like Gordon’s commitment to finish the night is not going to work. He gets so angry at some of the bumbling, that he systematically kicks out half the contestants from each side of the kitchen. It was crazy! Gordon would no sooner tell one to “F off to the dorm!”, when he’d hone in on another. I admit, if I had been there, I would have just turned into a slobbering idiot crouched in the walk-in with my hands protecting my head.

But that’s just me.

Some early front runners have to step up and save this mess. Three of them being Autumn, Ed, and Scott (who has already proclaimed himself the winner.) Service gets completed, and it’s time to announce the winning team. As Gordon says, they both sucked. But the women sucked more.

They nominate Fran and Stacy for elimination. I must say, I would have gotten rid of Fran. She’s whiny and clueless. But Ramsay goes with chef to the stars Stacey, and we wave goodbye.

Early predictions? Well. Just between you and me, I think Autumn is going to be evil and conniving. I can’t wait. There’s an awful lot of flotsam to wade through before we’ll get to the good contestants. But that’s true of any of these types of shows. Meanwhile, I shall sit back and enjoy my Gordon.

And hope there’s a doctor on set. Just in case.

Photo Credit: FOX

9 Responses to “Hell’s Kitchen – Is there a doctor in the house for Gordon Ramsay?”

June 2, 2010 at 3:13 AM

Huge fan of Gordon Ramsay, and a huge fan of his one time mentor, Marco Pierre White. Another great chef seen recently on the UK’s Master Chef was Michel Roux Jnr, and his second in command, the strangely beautiful and slightly scary Monica “get that garnish on the plate” (New Zealand accent) Galetti.

June 2, 2010 at 1:08 PM

Wow, Man With Sword, you really seem to know your chefs! Thanks for your comments!

June 2, 2010 at 12:46 PM

*comes in to comment …. steps over the drool left from Tara’s gushing over Gordon*

Mullet? I’m going to have to go back and check out “Mr. Waxy” Mikey Termini and see if he truly has a mullet … because I’m pretty sure it’s nothing more than a coiffed pompadour-ish mohawk. (You see … I know mullet. Had one for years.) And I kinda like the guy … the fact he can’t cook a decent halibut notwithstanding.

Ramsey was in rare form last night. It was as if he was in mid-season form rather than the beginning of a new one.

Agreed: The bit with his wife could’ve been packaged and resold in the Cheez-Whiz section of your local grocer. What the hell were they thinking?

I don’t give Autumn much time. I predict she’ll skate for a bit and then get horribly tromped on in the coming weeks.

June 2, 2010 at 1:10 PM

Michael, you’re right it is a mohawk. But a mullety one.

June 2, 2010 at 1:59 PM

Girl! How many F***’n legs does a lobster have? :)

June 2, 2010 at 2:01 PM

I’m always surprised at how easily these professional chefs crumble under pressure…maybe it’s the whole experience of being taken out of their comfort zone. I know I’d be blubbing like a baby in the corner :)

June 2, 2010 at 8:42 PM

I think that there’s a big difference when you’re not in your own kitchen. Makes sense, no?

June 3, 2010 at 9:17 AM

Ed seems the likely winner to me. He’s a quiet leader who is there to cook, not to make an idiot of himself like some of these others. Those are the kind of people who Ramsay tends to choose to run his restaurants. Jason also didn’t get yelled at and might be in good shape, but that could just be because there was so much bad. Scott will last to the final five or six before succumbing – Ramsay holds these self-important people to a higher standard, and I’ve seen nothing to show he can stand up to that. The Italian guy (no discernable talent, and annoying) and the crazy farmer (yelling at Ramsay in the preview) will probably both be kicked off next episode, if past seasons serve as a guide. I really enjoy this show. (-:

June 3, 2010 at 2:49 PM

Adam, thanks for your thoughts! Salvatore, the Italian guy, is annoying. After 21 years in this country, they have to use subtitles on his Italian accent? Puh-leeze. And since you like the show, I hope you’ll be here with my posts this season to frequently comment!

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