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The Practice virgin’s diary – The penis never lies … unless it’s been enlarged

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(Season 4, Episodes 4-6)

Three types of clients appear on The Practice: the one-off jokesters, the multiple-episode-arc accused, and the repeat customers. A lot of the first group are lightweights, though I suppose that makes sense. The middle category has yielded some interesting television, and I’m sure it will continue to do so — those trials are generally the sensational ones. But for some reason, this show has the most love for the third group of clients. Shows definitely should not live in a bubble, but just how realistic is it that so many people keep on walking back into the offices of Donnell and Associates?

4.4 “Legacy”

This time it was Ray Oz (James Whitmore), fighting his wife Joanne (Bonnie Bartlett) over her plight to be named his conservator. Clearly Ray was worse than he was when first on the show, and clearly Bobby was going to ignore all of the signs.

Unfortunately, everybody but Bobby and Ray were right. Ray’s dementia was only getting worse, and it culminated in his murdering Joanne after winning the competency hearing. But Bobby to the rescue!

Eugene got corralled onto a case with sad-sack attorney Harland Bassett (Ernie Sabella), instantly recognizable to me as Leon Carosi. Great to see him! The only notable thing about the case was the penis viewing in Judge Hiller’s chambers — if you negate the fact that this guy is Jimmy in 20 years. Who gets a penile enlargement to avoid flashing charges?

And Ellenor fell apart over her failure to see that George Vogelman was a psycho. Except only in the last five minutes of the episode, when they found some time for her. Otherwise she was doing okay … glad to hear.

4.5 “Oz”

It’s Walter Powell! James T. Callahan made an appearance as Trevor Wayne, a friend of Ray Oz’s testifying for the prosecution in his murder trial. Bobby seemed like Lindsay when her professor was up on murder charges — totally irrational and dangerous. Going to Judge Kittleson and trying to get her to recuse herself on the grounds that she has a conflict with their firm because of Jimmy? After he went up against Helen countless times WHILE they were dating? Back it up, Bobby.

I’ve never understood the go-to of many of these legal series, that angering a testifying witness proves that they’re prone to violence because they can’t control themselves. Ray couldn’t get justifiably angry at Helen when she embarrassed him in open court without it looking like he’d murdered his wife in a fit of rage? Where’s the connection between the two?

They got the NG (not guilty) anyway, because Donnell and Associates always seems to win, and Helen’s a bad lawyer, but it still gets to me … I know how to cut vegetables, so I must be a serial murderer who slices his victims up with precision, right? Because “A” always gets you “T”….

4.6 “Marooned”

It looks like this wedding may still be on track. Lindsay bought a dress, only to discover that Bobby wanted her to wear his mother’s dress. I actually thought they’d go somewhere else with this — according to Bobby, they discussed the issue while Lindsay was in the hospital. I thought this was going to turn into a concern that she had lingering health issues following her stabbing. Instead that part was glossed over, and it became more about Bobby being too much of a bossy guy (which he is). Lindsay wants a partner in a marriage, as well she should … though I think she, or someone, needs to insist on that at the office, too. Bobby is not good at sharing.

While I don’t understand how the firm can afford to double up on any cases, I like Rebecca and Eugene together. I think they complement one another nicely, and they’re also friends, but don’t have a nauseating relationship. It’s a shame they got their client off on claims of PTSD following the abuse she suffered as a child by her father, only to have her kill her sister. The mother was one thing, but I think the sister was a little more revenge than it was as a result of visions of their dead father walking down the street. These things are going to haunt Rebecca.

Photo Credit: ABC

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