American Idol – The “Magnificent Seven” wrap-up

I have questions. Many questions.

Two American Idol contestants are nixed from an “extended” Top Seven elimination – Lil Rounds and Anoop Desai. Alert the media. (Too late.)

We knew these oustings were coming for any of the three “usual suspects”: Lil Rounds, Anoop Desai and Matt Giraud. (Added bonus! Allison “Red” Iraheta was in the mix this time ’round!) with Matt being saved last week – and, consequently, saved again by voters this week – it was Lil and Anoop that got the axe. (I picked Lil and Matt as the two who were departing in a previous CliqueClack post. Close, but no prize for me.)

Disco Night was not kind to any of the three … and especially not to Lil (whose hodge-podge vocals and turn of events from earlier judges’ accolades wore out her welcome long ago) or Anoop (who was awarded in an unprecedented turn of events at the start with a 13^th Idol contestant slot). Both contestant have been riddled with kitschy performances and uneven vocals throughout while wowing the judges in early rounds with promises of more good things to come. Promises that, in the end, did not pan out.

Now for the queries about Elimination Night. I’ll just pose a few of’em here:

1) This Idol episode featured group choreography by none other than our favorite judge Paula “Pauler” Abdul. Those were “dance moves?” Really? ‘Cause them “Moves Of Pauler” were lackluster ….. at best. It seemed Pauler worked hours (really?) with the final seven “teaching” them (really?) the most basic steps and gyrations possible in an effort to showcase their ineptness to sing and dance at the same time. And, even then, they couldn’t be trusted to perform those two things simultaneously as the “singing” was lip-synced once more. Hello! Singing competition! That’s what this is! It’s not a “lip-syncing” competition! Yeesh!

2) What in the world was the deal with K.C. who came out to breathlessly perform “Get Down Tonight?” He was winded throughout the entire performance. Poor guy. Two steps in and he was ready to collapse from exhaustion. It was an effort for him to keep the mike at his lips.  (‘Cause we all know it’s tough work holding things near your mouth.  Like forks.  And Dr. Pepper bottles.  And rumaki.)

3) Can David Archuleta enunciate at all more than just a few times during a performances? We had loads of fun trying to decipher his lyrics. Loads of fun.

“What’d he say? ‘Stop?’ And that … was that ‘Big?’ Did he just say ‘Wait’ or ‘What?’ I couldn’t tell. Did you hear ‘singing’ or ‘stinging’ just then?”

Gracious as ever, you have to give it to the kid. He is a trooper …. even in the face of an average, subdued song. The little girls and grandmas dig him still, however.

4) Isn’t it a given Matt Giraud is heading for the showers and a date with the concert tour come July 5^th? It is to me. Barring some miracle performance next week (which still won’t help) or some gigantic blunder by the others (McDoubtful), Matt is burnt toast.

5) Am I glad both Lil and Anoop are out of the competition? Yes, matter’n fact … yes I am.

Now …. let’s hurry up and wait for what’s in store next week.

(Look at me … I’m hurrying …..)

Clacked by Michael Noble
on Apr 23, 2009 @ 20:05 EST5EDT