(Season 13, Episode 8 – “I’m Like an Angry Cow”)
We’ve learned by now that Dan and Andrew, or Dandrew as Terence & Sarah dubbed them, aren’t the sharpest tools in the shed. Tonight they started bickering like an old married couple about how fast they should walk. “It’s about the team,” Andrew whined. “So if I want to be slow and pathetic like an old gimp, you should slow down too.”
“It’s a fucking race, dude. You don’t win races by walking, you big baby!” Dan countered. “Now shut the hell up and pick up the pace.”
“I don’t think you understand the term ‘team,’ dude. It means that if I want to lie down and drag my body up this hill by my fingers you should lie down and crawl with me. Like a team.” I may have exaggerated the dialogue a bit, but Andrew’s argument about teamwork meaning that Dan should slow down to his pathetic pace was about the lamest thing I’ve ever heard on this show.
The cow challenge brought out the stupid in almost everybody, or maybe they’re just getting tired after all this racing. First, Tina couldn’t find the clue on the bottom of the milk glass and then she had her and Ken put back the cow costume. Later, Dan and Andrew took a cab to the Pit Stop. All of these things could have been avoided by … reading … the … clue.
It was a little weird that Dan and Andrew didn’t have to take a time penalty, and instead were sent back to the point where the challenge ended so they could go to the Pit Stop on foot. All in all, the challenges were a little boring this week. Rummaging through thousands of chickens for a golden egg proved to be pretty boring, and nobody opted to learn the local music.
Instead, we got all four teams traipsing through the city in cow suits. Nick & Starr, of course, got to skip all of that by beating everyone to the Fast Forward and then being able to force the sheep ass fat down faster than Terence & Sarah. It was a lot easier to do when Terence decided he couldn’t undo fifteen years of vegetarianism for a million dollars. Even Phil called him on that when his decision there wound up not only costing them a chance at a first place finish, but led to them being eliminated altogether.
Final Placement
I’m really enjoying the foursome of Nick, Starr, Toni & Dallas at the lead of this thing. I know it’s a race, but can you just imagine if Dallas and Starr hook up? Not only could they appear on a future edition of the Race as a new couple, but the foursome is ready if they ever bring back that horrible “Family Edition” version of the Race.
Next week should be a no-brainer. Unless something horrible happens to the top three teams there, Dan and Andrew are in big trouble. As much as Ken & Tina grate on my nerves, they’re good. There’s also one more non-elimination leg coming. Could it be next week?
Clacked by Jason Hughes 
on Nov 17, 2008 @ 17:28 EST5EDT
Kelly & Christy, the divorcees, dubbed Dan & Andrew Dandrew.
Terence is a bitch. Sarah deserves better.